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Friday, June 15, 2012

Happy Father's Day - to my dad & to all the dads out there

This is SO my dad!
Today, I'm thinking of my dad.

I guess that makes perfect sense since Father's Day is just this Sunday.

My dad was a very likable guy.  Generous, kind, silly - the voice of reason in many situations.  I like to think I got my heart and my sillies from him.

He never let people pick him down.  He put himself right out there and didn't care what people thought.  At least he didn't appear to.

My dad had an artificial leg, a "wooden leg" as he called it.  Many times we'd be getting ready to leave to go someplace & we'd be trailing out the door & my dad would stop dead in his tracks.  One of us would say, "What's the matter, daddy?" and he'd look up to the sky and very casually reply, "Checking for woodpeckers."  See, silly. 

He is the parent I try to be most like & the one I feel had the biggest influence on me.

For my dad, it was keeping the rest of us from doing stupid stuff!

He had a way of looking at things and seeing them through to the core.  Good or bad. If he thought it was something inherently bad for you - he'd have absolutely no problem telling you so, and he made sure to do so in a way you'd listen.


One very notable thing for me, toward the end of my dad's life, was in my relationship with Gary.  Now, my dad LOVED Gary.  Really!  Gary was my first love and my dad fully approved of him as my boyfriend.  He was a nice guy, he treated me well, he was respectful - but also because he grew up with Gary's dad.

Sometimes Gary would come to see me at my dad's on the weekends and he would end up hanging out back and talking to my dad for hours.  Many times I wouldn't even know he was there unless I went to hang out back with my dad.

So when my dad told us that we fought entirely too much to remain a "couple" we both listened.  We hated it, but we listened.  (eventually)



My dad knew we loved each other, but when we fought, it was knock down, drag out (nothing physical, of course) and neither of us backed down.  Dad saw that & sat us right down.  He talked to us - on his level.  He never forbade us to see each other.  He never said Gary was no longer welcome in his home.  He said, "You two fight entirely too much.  There is not enough love in the world to overcome a relationship where two people fight to the degree you two fight."

Dad was right.  The fun & love just wasn't enough.  Gary and I split as a couple - but remained close friends until the day he died.

It was also for that reason that when my dad died, Gary traveled from South Carolina to New Jersey to be there for me.  He had a great deal of respect for my dad.  Not just because our dads grew up together, but because my dad treated him with respect.

That was who my dad was.  He always maintained his role as authority figure, but still managed to be our friend.  He loved us all, and we knew it.

As a parent myself now, I know that's not easy when you're still actually raising your children. 

Now I'm married to an amazing man, who is also an amazing dad & step dad.  He put up with a lot of crap, and still kept on going.  I respect that so much.

I also respect all of you other dads.  Especially you single parent, dads.  Bless you all! 

I'm thankful for the influence my dad had on me, and I feel blessed every single day of my life that I had my dad for the time I had him.

He really was - one amazing soul!

With that, I end off saying - Happy Father's Day to to my wonderful husband, my daddy in Heaven & all you dads out there!

Big Giant SMOOCHIES!


Thank you for reading my blog!


~Jenn

3 comments:

  1. What a beautiful tribute to your Dad. The woodpecker joke made me chuckle, sounds like a great bloke. I lost my Dad too, so I understand the mixed emotion of Fathers day.
    Catherine x

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  2. Following you from the TGIF blog hop. I hope you will stop by Swanky Baby and follow us too! Have a good weekend!

    Swanky Baby
    swankybaby.net

    ReplyDelete
  3. You just gave me chills and brought tears to my eyes. What a beautiful post. Your daddy would be so proud of you :)

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