Tuesday, August 21, 2012
The Good Stuff...
As I sit here plopped on my couch with my coffee, I'm watching my beautiful daughter play her Wii game.
Maybe that doesn't sound like much to you all, but to me - it's a little bit of everything.
Let's face it, the past few weeks have been a culmination of crap that just exploded in more directions than I could clean up at once.
Some stuff being realities I never wanted to see, now coming to light and other stuff - well, just bigger. The creeping ick began to settle in & thought that I'd allow it to stay!
Not in this lifetime.
I'm not one of those Debbie Downer types. If I see someone sad, I try to be all Suzy Sunshine & happiness. Sometimes it's welcome, sometimes its not. No matter. I try to find the good in the crap and I'll just keep looking until I find something. Anything.
Weirdly, I really AM just fine with everything that's been going on. Some of the stuff I'm used to and it just rolls right off my back. The bite may sting a little, but I can still brush it right off, shrug my shoulders and continue forward. Some bites sting a little more, because I wasn't expecting them. Those
may will take a little longer to heal.
I'm tough - I'm persistent - nothing will keep me down, trust me!
Back to my daughter - My reason to smile, to be happy in the right now. She was one of the things I REALLY wanted after my son was born.
Don't think for a moment that my son wasn't enough - because he is my shining star. My love and light, my first born, who has grown into an amazing human being that allows me to beam with pride.
You see, when my darling dearest son was a little boy, he wanted a baby sister. Every day from the time he was 4 years old, he asked me for a baby sister - as if it were this easy feat. My son was my special buddy and I wanted him to have everything he wanted.
His father and I were
headed sprinting down divorce row. Thing were not at all pleasant, and a baby wasn't something I could consider, let alone promise at the time - even though, like him - I longed for a baby girl.
Life, course moved on.
I met and married my amazing husband and to help Kyle along with his wish - we "worked" toward expanding our family.
The pregnancy journey was unkind to me.
When we finally got pregnant with baby girl AND I made it all the way through my first and second trimester - it was like the party already started!! We were all thrilled.
When she finally arrived - he WAS an incredibly proud big brother.
In preparation, I'd gotten him the "Big Brother" hat and a special shirt custom made with a big brother & a baby sister & their names. He wore both until he could no longer fit in them.
Yes, they bickered - of course they bickered - they're siblings. BUT let someone else pick on HIS baby sister, his pride and joy - NOT happening!
It's these things that make me get through the ick...
The 5 minute Facetime call that I didn't expect to receive from my son, who is currently serving our country or just sitting here on my couch, with my coffee and my kitty cat watching my baby girl play on her Wii - and then Chickadee joining in. It's hearing the laughter and the love and knowing that THIS is really what it's all about. The good stuff.
The ick may try to settle in to other areas of my life, and it is trying - but I'm a tough little Jersey Girl. I have no intention of letting it get me down.
Where a door slams shut...A window is opened.
Look out for that open window!
And have a fabulous day!
Happy Birthday to my baby girl!!
I love you to the moon & back, to infinity & beyond! xxoo