It's not such a surprise, it's the reason that songs like this were made.
"You always hurt the ones you love, you always break the kindest heart"
(Ryan Gosling/Jimmy Kimmel Parody)
Ever wonder why that is? Is it the need to rise above, while crushing another? I've never really understood, but I've most certainly have been victim to in the past. Yes, by people whom I've trusted with my heart.
..and I've stepped back & walled up and that's that.
...I'm just not that tough.
I'm not so innocent. I've broken hearts in my past, but I've never done so using my knowledge of a person or their deeds, against them. I find that a huge breech of loyalty and friendship.
A huge betrayal.
I'm backwards, I suppose. If I feel a type of bond with someone, I give them a little bit of trust & build from there. Break it and it's gone forever.
Loyalty is important to me. If you are my friend or someone close to me and I've given you my love and trust - I am loyal to you. Your secrets are my secrets. I will defend you until the end and I won't let another speak against you. It is for this reason, that when someone takes things they know about me and uses those things against me to make themselves somehow look better, it totally crushes me.
Forgiveness is the easy part. It's the trust.
How could you give someone you heart & all that goes with it, have them crush it & then go on as if nothing has ever happened? I'm not sure it's possible. I struggle with this. Constantly.
In my life I've had a few relationships go horribly wrong for this exact reason.
I hate to believe that I'm an easy mark. I may be accommodating, but I'm no fool.
I have, though, been sucked into the "net" where I've let my guard down and believed in the relationship I'd formed. (Note: relationship is general and not specific) Only to be broken.
Trust shattered. Wall up. Things forever changed.
No one is above another. We are all just people. Some have more, some have less. Some can do, others can't. YOU are not better. You are just you.
Is it REALLY worth breaking the heart of someone who you KNOW loves you to death and who would do anything for you - just to rise above, or look better for a split second?
In the long run, how do you look standing there alone?
When the love you love most of all can take no more...
Is that the look you were going for?
Does that make you feel better about yourself?
Thank you for reading my blog!
~Jenn
You always hurt the one you love
The one you shouldn't hurt at all
You always take the sweetest rose
Crush it, til the petals fall
You always break the kindest heart
With a hasty word you can't recall
The one you shouldn't hurt at all
You always take the sweetest rose
Crush it, til the petals fall
You always break the kindest heart
With a hasty word you can't recall
PS. For anyone who may worry about me with this blog... it doesn't pertain to me at all at this point in my life. :) xoxo Love you all!
Love the disclaimer ;) And I totally understand the sentiment. I am like you in the sense that I will totally trust someone until they give me a reason not to, and then I don't anymore. It's very hard to rebuild that once it's broken, and if you're going to break it, you really better make sure you're doing it for a darn good reason because you'll probably never get it back again or will have to work really, really hard to get it back again.
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