I look in the mirror & think ewww... Nice muffin top chubs. Why don't you go on over & have another brownie to sit on your thighs...
Yes, I regularly heckle myself in front of the mirror. You too?
I'm not sure that men get this. They'd have to weigh in on that (no pun intended). Guys?
I do, however - reach out to my young fans. The short - honest ones who may be bribed easily with chocolate. That's right - I'll admit it. I bribe kids to say nice things to me to make me feel better about myself. There, I said it.
|Miss Jenn's the GREATEST!|
Sadly, as most of these kids have grown older they've stopped telling me that I'm the greatest & have now resorted to telling me that they're used to my "weirdness." Ha! I'll take that too....
There's no short supply of young minions to carry out my daily affirmation tasks... My little friend, whose name I withhold because his momma will just know, once uttered the F word my way. No, no not THAT F-word.... The OTHER F word...FAT. Don't be horrified, momma - it's OK. Like I told my little friend - I've got a mirror.
I am seriously not the person who will be insulted or taken aback by anything a child says to me. I love little kids & their brand of honesty is much like mine. Broken filter. You think it, you speak it. No biggie. Like I said, I've got a mirror.
OF COURSE - this did put my diet into motion faster. It's been a rough few years. Docs had me on steroids and to say that I've packed on the pounds is the understatement of the century. I knew I needed to do something about it & he gave me the proper kick. (see, it really IS OK)
I'm happy to report that I've lost 15 lbs so far!
Now you KNOW I had to make all this work to my advantage. So I said to my young friend... "I've started a diet. Am I still fat?" He of course, answered honestly (don't be mad momma, I goaded him) I then proceeded to tell him that I was going on a diet & that his new job, every day, was to say, "Miss Jenn, you're looking skinnier today."
Every morning, I start my day off as usual...
I look in the mirror & try to camouflage the icky spots that I don't like. I take my girls to the bus stop & see my little friend who gives me my daily affirmation....
"Miss Jenn, you look skinnier today."
....and I can properly go about my day.
Whatever it takes, right :)
Have a fabulous day full of wonder and joy -- and yes, YOU ARE BEAUTIFUL!!
Thank you for reading my blog!!