Stuck in the past

I've made no bones about saying that my downward descent toward the next big -0- in my life has been freaking me out.

Have you ever heard the song 1985 by Bowling for Soup?  If not, click the orange link & you can.

I was never into the whole "dressing like Madonna" thing.  She became popular during my senior year of high school.


ANYWAY, my point here -
How the hell did I get so old?

When I listen to that song, I laugh because I can relate so well.  I've mentally made it my little theme song.

Every once in a while I long for my younger years; Late teens, early 20's.

Ahhh, those were the days.  When I was single, made a ton of money and could just pick up and go when ever I wanted to.  No real responsibilities.  I paid my bills and on Friday... Hmmmm, let's go to...Ooh, Barbados!  Ahh, that freedom of just picking up and going.  Sometimes I really miss that.

But here I am...Mommy, Wifey.  I'm not complaining.  Fact is, I wouldn't trade it for anything.  I've dreamed of being where I am right now my whole life.  I love being home & cooking for my family.  Taking care of everyone.  Being mommy taxi and transporting kids to practices and sporting events or whatever and just being there for them.  This IS who I am!

I may not be this ultra-cool and hot 20 anything who could just pick up and go at any time, but who cares?

I had great fun - but I was running around trying to catch the bull by the tail.

Now, I've got the bull's tail and I'm swingin' it around like it's my job.

I wouldn't trade it for anything.

So yeah, sometimes I do still miss my wild and crazy youth.

But where I am, is most certainly where I belong!

Thank you so much for reading my blog!!

Have a fantastic day!!

~Jenn

Like a dog with a bone....

Admittedly, when I've got something that I can't seem to work out - I'm like a dog with a bone!

I will NOT let it go until I have my desired outcome - or at least an outcome that I can understand.

This does not always bode well for me because I can be fairly relentless.  People don't always like this.


For the most part, others are safe.  It's me.  I'm incredibly hard on myself.  No matter who's right or who's wrong in a situation, I will internalize it and try to fix it.


It's because I truly care.

The "Fixer,"

That's me. 

Give me something, anything and I will find a way to fix it - or I will totally obsess over it until it works out as I think it should.


I think that's why child services has blessed me with so many of the kids that need "fixing".  Medical, emotional - whatever - gimme your kids - I'll fix 'em.  Or do as much as humanly possible to help them.

When they leave here, they've got all the medical care they needed, services they needed, a solid plan, a ton of clothes and of course shoes.  Not to mention a better sense of self than they came with.  This, I'm good at.

Of course, in the fixing there's the bonding & then when they move on, I'm the one who needs fixing.


Lately, I've been fairly obsessive about getting my "house" in order.  Not my actual HOUSE - just the things I need to deal with.

I'm at the stage in my life where things are not exactly where I was hoping they'd be.

For the most part, my life is great.  There are a few things I don't understand, but I'm working through it.  It's more the ME stuff that I've got to get in order.  Things I need to let go of.  Relationships that need to be forgiven and mended or just filed away for now.  Needing to accept the fact that not everything is in my realm of power.  I can't fix everything & I need to deal with that.

I'm the one who needs fixing now, and I'm working on it.

Stay tuned.

It only gets better.

Thank you for reading my blog!

~Jenn

I'm sorry...Does it say WELCOME across my back??

Well HELLO, I'm not a doormat!

I really do have to stop being so darned accommodating!

I'm all about the do unto others, but sometimes - just sometime I really just want to scream ENOUGH!

I'll do anything for anyone, just because.

Why is it that some people just take, take, take, take, take?  They delight in it and then they just mow over the top of you as if you're not even there?

They think they're above it all...entitled.

I try

I get that it's about giving and not receiving - but at some point, I get tired.  I get tired because I always try to do the right thing.  Whether I want to or not, for whatever reason.  Maybe it's to keep the peace, not make waves for someone else or just keep things nice.  I try to do what's right.  So why is it that I get fed the biggest pile of crapola?

Oh, believe me - I'm not thin skinned or too meek to open my mouth.  I just shouldn't have to.

Has anyone EVER gotten the impression that I'm afraid to say what's on my mind???  Yeah - didn't think so.

I know that Biblically speaking - we're supposed to keep forgiving & keep turning the other cheek - but darn it, my cheeks are sore!  All of em!

When is enough enough?

It's not my actual friends that take advantage of me.  It's more the "outsiders".  The ones I don't particularly want to be around (go figure) that I need to deal with at one time or another that take the most advantage.

I've never been some desperate and needy soul that feels they need to lay down all that they are to have people like me.  Sure, I like to be liked - who doesn't?  But my radar is  pretty darn good.  I love everyone - until you give me a good reason not to.  Then I'll just deal with you when I need to.  I'm not good at being a fake or a phoney.  I'll do what I have to do, when I need to - but I'm not inviting you for coffee either.

Even "new" people.  Some people just see their little opening & crawl right in & make themselves at home. Um - no, I don't think so.

You see, unlike many of the people around me - I have an extremely high tolerance level.  You may annoy me, you may piss me off - but I will just smile through & take a mental note.

Never ever mistake my kindness and tolerance for weakness.  I'm stronger than you'll ever know.

So, yes.  I will tolerate the nonsense to keep the party going, but you may not be on the next guest list.

Be kind.  Don't take advantage of the people who are kind to you.

Do unto others as you'd have done to you.

It's just the right thing to do!

Thank you for reading my blog!

~Jenn

No longer a "karaoke virgin"...Now, Karaoke GODDESS :)

Saturday night, my friends - I had my first ever karaoke moment.

Which in my mind - probably went sort of like the video in the link above.

Yep, that's right, ME.  I sang in front of people.  Not like singing in church, in front of people.  That I can do.

ME, with a microphone on a dance floor singing, loudly.  And I loved it :)

I'm not saying that I was good, I'm saying it was fun!

For years I've been saying, "There's not enough alcohol in the bar to get me to karaoke."

Apparently, I don't need any stinkin' alcohol.  All I really needed is my current little "I don't give a crapola" attitude and my good friends prodding me along.

It all started with Trish - who has an AMAZING voice.
I wasn't singing.  I was a "background dancer".  THAT, I can do!

Then, my friend Carrie said she and I could do something together.

Hey, just by the way...what happened to "Friends don't let friends drunk karaoke"?  Oh, right...sober.

Our choice...Leather and Lace.

THIS I can do.  I sang this song to both of my kids every night at bedtime for years.  I know the words - I know how it goes.  I can do this.

I did it..And I liked it.  I liked it alot.

It was FUN!

I'm pretty sure there were dogs howling in the distance - but I liked it.

Crazy like!

I was like a junkie on crack.  Looking for a fix.  I wanted more.

Yes, Karaoke Mistress, I'd like a song.
No, no - I don't want to wait my turn - I want to sing.  Loudly!

More, Karaoke Mistress - please I've been good.  I promise - just a little more.  I promise to tell my friends where they can find you.

Was I good??  I don't know.  It always sounds better in the shower.

No one clapped after the third time - or was it fourth?

Oh who cares!  I was belting it out like it was my job!

I left on fire.


I took my curtain call - thanked my beautiful hostess for the opportunity to reveal my inner Karaoke goddess, wished her a very happy 40th, and made a graceful exit.

I'm now staring down the karaoke machine my little princess got for her birthday a few years ago.  It's dust covered at the moment, but I know that I've got the karaoke CD's around here somewhere.

So if you hear dogs howling in the distance.  Or yours goes running & hides under the bed don't worry.  There's no major storm coming.  It's just me that they hear.  You know, that awful tone that only dogs can here.

On that, thank you to my dear friends, Carrie & Trish for guiding me gently into my newly embraced, Karaoke goddess.

To Tina, HAPPY 40TH BIRTHDAY!!

Thank you all for reading my silliness & have a wonderful day!

~Jenn

Salute to the Karaoke Mistress...Colleen @ Karaoke with Colleen - go see her on Facebook!

Sarcastic??? Moi???

If it weren't for sarcasm, I don't think I'd ever get my point across!

When I worked for Andy, years back - he used to call it "kidding on the square."

Sometimes there really isn't a nice or diplomatic way to say something to someone.  A little sarcasm goes along way!

At the risk of appearing that I'm using this as a forum to ex-bash, while referring to my son's father, (though he totally deserves to be bashed at this particular re-write) at particularly idiotic times - he was referred to as "Richard Dumas"  I know that's a bit cryptic, but I know some of you immediately get that little idiom.  (if not, click on Richard Dumas that is highligted & no his name isn't Richard)

Seriously though - how do you even keep a straight face sometimes?  Especially when you KNOW someone is just begging for the sarcastic answer.

Someone once said that most of the population of the planet isn't all that bright...  Well alrighty then....  I guess that explains everything.

Hello??  Anyone in there??  Nope!

Especially when I speak in little tiny words & still get deer in the headlights look.

I freely admit that I'm not always the sharpest knife in the drawer.  Where I can excel in intelligence & book smarts - I totally lack in common sense.  I've been the brunt of many a joke.

It's all good, if I'm going to put it out there - I fully expect to get it back.

And you can bet that I will bust out laughing, alone in my car, like a mental patient, a week later... when I finally get it...

If you can't laugh at yourself, you have no business laughing at someone else!

Life is short, much too short to be serious all the time!

If you can't dazzle them with your brains, baffle them with your...  well, you know... and let your freak flag fly, baby!

Sarcasm is good - well, most of the time :)

Have a happy day!!

Thank you for reading my blog!

~Jenn

Really? Must we be so literal???

A few weeks ago, I posted something on the I Heart Radio site about the song Brain Stew by Green Day.

Basically, I was listening to the song while it was on the radio & my daughter was in the kitchen & I cranked it up...and then...the F-Bomb... Oops.

Ok, whatever moving on.  

I was being goofy & posted on the website, "Apparently it's not such a good idea to teach my 9 year old Brain Stew, lol"

Wanna talk about getting attacked?

"What kind of mom would teach their 9 year old Brain Stew?"

"Lighten up and get over yourself."

"Why would any idiot teach their kid Brain Stew?  It's clearly about heroine."

"Don't post stupid ass comments if you can't back them up."

REALLY????  First of all... did everyone NOT see the LOL???

And the proper use of heroine is...

Secondly...  Do you really think I'm there with the chalk board outlining the entire meaning behind the song - all of the words, etc??  Um nooooooooo

It's called music appreciation, ya Jack Wagon!

It's HEARING the MUSIC & learning to love MUSIC.

When you listen to the music you don't always pay attention to the lyrics - unless of course you have a 9 year old in the room then oops...  next song.  But really, people??  To go out on a full scale attack over a stupid comment & totally trash someone?

Clearly you are unaware of my little blog here...Where I could possibly rip you to shreds with my audience of thousands...But I won't do that.  Because I'm a thick skinned little Jersey chick that knows you're just some literal, judgmental wahoo!  So poo on you!

To set the record straight to the chick who cut me down...When I was about 9 my father took me to a Pink Floyd concert.  Ok, in retrospect, that may have not been the most well thought out decision, but things were different then.

My point is...HELLO....He didn't take me because he wanted to teach me to get high (though with all the scents wafting by, it may very well have happened.)  He took me there to learn to LOVE THE MUSIC.

If you can't just love the music without listening to the lyrics ... you really need to learn how to just shut up and listen!

Thank you all for reading my blog!

~Jenn

My Top 5 Celebrity Crushes...

Yeah, I don't know why I'm going here... I guess I just thought it would be fun since I never post anything like this.

For The most part, I am not the type of person to go for the hottest guy who has the best of everything.  I'm more one to look all the way through.  To see the good stuff first & then appreciate the whole package - but it's always fun to look & be a little superficial...

So on that, I start with the youngest first:

David Beckham

Seriously...Do I even need to say anything here?

Beautiful!  He genuinely doesn't even need to speak.  He can just sit there and be pretty.

Who cares if he's got a brain?  Shhhhh...don't speak sweetie.  Just sit there - just like that and be hot.

He's also green eyed, like me.

#2:  Matthew McConaughey

Yowza!  Yes, he's always been one of my faves!

From the crooked little smile to the abs...My Word!

Who cares if he likes to play naked bongos while he gets stoned?

He's another one who can just sit there & be pretty.  But I do have to say - his little accent is also very cute, so chatter away.  I may not hear you, though.

#3:  Kevin Scorbo

Oh My!  Herculese & a Viking!

How can you possibly go wrong here??  You can't!  I also have a great deal of respect for this man.  He's battled major health issues in his life and pushed his way through while shooting the Hercules series.  He comes off a little arrogant, at times, in his book...but look at him.  Who cares??

#4:  Kevin Costner

I just love him!  He may not be David Beckham or Hercules - but he's just so endearing & one of my biggest celebrity crushes.  From Robin Hood to Dances with Wolves - I think I've seen every movie he's done - just because he's in it.  Still sexy at 56.

Looking at my list here, I guess I'm a sucker for blue eyes...

Last, but certainly not least:  Sir Sean Connery

From 007 to Captain Ramius and beyond, how can we not love Sean Connery?  There is nothing this man cannot do and his sex appeal defies the ages.  Look at him...81 years old & he's still got it!  Seriously!  And he's a man of substance as well.

Look at the other older hotties, who are younger than him; Robert Redford, Kris Kristofferson for example...both younger.  Neither held up as well as our beloved 007.

Rock it, Sean... I loves ya!

These are my celebrity crushes...A few didn't make the cut - but get an honorable mention.

Jon Bon Jovi

Jersey's own home grown hottie!  Almost 50, a devoted husband and family man.  Still rockin' it out & representing Jersey.  A great humanitarian and all around good guy.  Yes, he's smokin' hot too... but I could only pick 5 - so you're my first Honorable Mention.

and...

My hubby (who will kill me for posting this picture)  

He may not be a "celebrity", but he's the king of my heart.  Because when it really comes down to it...no matter how much browsing I may seem to do - he's the only "celebrity" that matters to me.

How'd I do?

Thank you for reading my blog!

Hope you enjoy!

~Jenn