After all, they're the ones you've lived most of your life with. In many instances, the first other kids you'd ever known. Your first friends. Your first partners in crime. The ones you hated at times, but would still die for.
They know all the buttons to push, when to push 'em & how hard.
Siblings are an important piece(s) to the puzzle that is your life.
Around this time of the year, I get really sad.
On August 27th, 2007 I lost my younger brother.
It was truly one of the worst days of my life, if not the worst.
I'm not going to get all high and mighty and speak with piety - because the worst part of my brother leaving this planet without me getting to say good bye is that we weren't speaking, and I hate that! We hadn't spoken for several years. Even worse than all of that - our not speaking had NOTHING to do with each other.
Outside circumstances - people - events are what came between us, what divided us.
Eric was my first sibling. Number 2 in the pecking order, with me being the big sister, the numero uno at the top of the heap. He and I fought - oh my gosh, how we fought. As an adult, I'm embarrassed to say that we actually fist fought and even drew blood. If my kids fought like we fought, I don't even know what I'd do. Looking back, it was really awful - but we loved still each other.
He always knew that as much of a pain in the butt as he was - and believe me, he was - I was always there for him. I was always the first person he'd call if he needed help, if he was really sad, or if he needed money. Whatever it was - he knew he had a no questions asked policy with me.
Even though I was his older sister, I was his main care taker growing up. He knew that, I knew that. So when he left this planet - I was completely out of sorts. I wasn't there to help him this time. I didn't know he was suffering. I didn't know he had pain. He didn't come to me, like he had in the past. He struggled with whatever it was - in silence, not talking to anyone. As a result, my dear brother took his own life.
I genuinely think of my brother every single day, feeling as if I'd failed him in some way.
A friend of mine's mom went through the same situation with her sister. Many years before I lost Eric she would tell me over and over, "Jenn, keep trying. Just keep trying. Call him, send him letters. Do whatever you can - because if something happens and you're not speaking, you'll never forgive yourself."
She was right.
My point of this posting is not to draw sympathy to me - but attention to your own sibling relationships. I know a few people - right off the top of my head who aren't speaking to their siblings. Some issues are big, others small - others just flat out foolish pride. It's not worth it! Let it go!
There is NOTHING on this planet worth a division between siblings. NOTHING!
Work it out! Somehow, some way.
Because in the end, when you look back on your life - the endless reel of memories that will play out in your mind WILL have your siblings in it.
How awesome is it to share that with them?
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re-post from August 23, 2012