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Tuesday, April 30, 2013

If they're talking TO you, they're talking ABOUT you...

Often, while I was growing up, I was told - "Don't worry about what other people say about you."  That was usually preceded by - "They're jealous of you." or "They're insecure about themselves."

In my adult life, I have been more able to point out the "jealous" or "insecure" comments coming from other people, whether directed at me or another.

Sometimes, though - it just plain feels bad when you're on the receiving end.  Regardless of the reason you're being spoken about, jealousy or insecurity factors go right out the window when feelings are involved.

I try to be really good about not judging people.  Don't get me wrong -- I'm no saint - BUT I (mostly) keep my comments to myself, because - pfft - who the hell am I?  I have absolutely no business tearing someone else down.  I'm far from perfect.

I think that's one of the things that enrages me the most when other people do it.

I've been around this, often.  I try to ignore it.  I've often turned a deaf ear to it or tried to talk up the person being talked down just to make it stop.  It's speaks so much more of the person doing the yapping than the person being yapped about.  Eventually it gets to be so much that people start comparing notes and realize that they too have been on the chopping block.

There only ends up being one person on the outside looking in.

I mean - gosh....  I don't recall the sun rising and setting over anyone specifically.  Why would we believe for a second that we get to judge?

I'm no saint.  I've had my days of bashing and not being so nice.  It's something I've changed about myself because I got the "who the hell are you?" slap upside my head along with the very humbling, "You ain't all that, girlfriend."  I've also grown up and I genuinely care about other people and their feelings.

I have no time for bitterness and gossip or perpetuating nonsense.  I look at things for what they are and truly love everyone for who they are.  Not everyone is easy to love, but that doesn't give anyone else the carte blanche to tear them down.  I don't want to be around that!  Who does?

Check your ego at the door.  I'm incredibly sorry if you are insecure or jealous or whatever, but that's your problem.  No one else's.

Being kind matters.

It is always important to remember.... If someone is talking about someone else TO you, they are talking to someone else ABOUT you.

Just stop.

Be kind.

Enjoy your day!

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  1. You took the words right out of my mouth! Hugs!!

  2. Thank you for this post, I needed it :)

  3. Touche`sister!

    I gotta say, I was/am one of the most hypocritical and judgemental people that I know.

    As you know, I am an educated medical professional.This has changed my point of view two-fold. This is not a "job" is my career. I treated my patients with the dignity and respect that they deserved. ( I love elderly peps...they have wisdom and really are funny).
    I miss working but I have to get this degree and my RN license.

    Here is my old neighbor and I would go to the store for groceries. ( I gave her a ride). Well, she had tattoos and piercings all over, including her face. My daughter gave her a precision haircut and colored it a pinkish purple. Anyway, I'm at the store to take care of business and she told me that we were getting dirty looks. Me being submerged in making sure I get what's on my list, had no idea. They thought that we were lesbians :O

    We are both 100% heterosexual. So just because a person LOOKS a certain way, does not mean that they are what you think.
    Another example, I used to be for better lack of words...homophobic. My fiancée's 20 yr old nephew is gay.Now I was raised as a conservative Texan so you can Imagine my stance on that.
    BUT, all it took to change my views is when my nephew found his soulmate. I see him HAPPY and IN LOVE!!! Love is love and they are getting married this fall in NY. I'm so happy for them!

    Like they say...Karma can be a real bitch. She is also kind. I like it that way


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